If you're a spiritual person, karma is a very important consideration for you. And if you are not a spiritual person, it's even more important - because you are probably doing very bad things.People think that karma is very complicated, but it isn't. Karma is very simple. We in the business think of karma as being like a specialised kind of personal bank account. When you do something good, your karmic account goes into credit. When you do something bad, that's a debit item in your account. If you make more karmic withdrawals (like pinching stuff from the office store cupboard, or enjoying watching someone in pain) than karmic deposits (helping an old lady across the road, giving money to a beggar) then you'll go into karmic debt. Naturally, karmic interest will be charged on this debt, so to get back into the karmic black again, you'll have to do slightly better and more difficult things (setting up monthly payments to a charity, saying your sorry to someone you don't like).
But if instead of that you do something rather worse (smacking a child and really quite enjoying it) then you may well be going beyond the limits of your karmic spending limits and you'll have an unauthorised karmic overdraft. The rate of interest will increase and your karmic debt will grow more quickly. If you regularly commit a particular iniquity (shoplifting repeatedly from the same store) you will be creating what we call a 'karmic standing order'.
A certain level of modest karmic debt is perfectly acceptable, but you can get into serious trouble if your karmic spending spirals out of control when you're regularly making major karmic withdrawals (stealing sweeties from very small children, trying to run people over in your car). You could then get into chronic karmic debt where any repayments may be barely paying off the interest, and the karmic capital owed is untouched. And if you don't start doing something about it, you'll automatically be subject to penalty payments. This is where unwanted things start happening to you to rebalance your account. They'll relate in nature to whatever you were doing to get into debt, but they'll be worse (choking on one of those stolen sweets, someone else running you over, or the wife on whom you cheated runs off with the vicar who married you). These can wipe out large chunks of debt instantaneously, but it's a dangerous game.
So here's my advice to you. Don't worry too much about the odd little sin here and there - let's admit it, these are fun and at the very low rates of interest available karmic credit is very cheap: too good to miss. Those people who pay off their karmic account every month are really very dull people. And I'm sure you all know the ones who make sure they're in karmic credit at all times - goody-two-shoes, holier-than-thou types who are a real pain in the spiritual butt, I'm sure you'll agree.
Beware, however, the other extreme. Because if your karmic overspending really gets out of hand you may find yourself paying the ultimate penalty - where your entire karmic overdraft is called in, in one final payment. You know what we're talking about here - terminal karmic bankruptcy. And it could be worse than that - if this isn't enough to discharge your debt, the rest will carry over and you'll start your next time round in the red.
The karmic bank manager has a very long memory. And the karmic debt collectors always get their man - or woman, child, dog, cat, rabbit or stone. And the last thing you want is a really crap eternal karmic credit rating.
Copyright Gerry Thompson/ Positive Comedy 2005
www.positivecomedy.com
For further info in UK call 01273 463611 or 07986 561860
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